Be Careful What You Witch For

So today I was thinking about an old spell I did and I thought it would be a good lesson to blog about. I am a healer and so it hurts me when I see those that I am closest to in pain. My husband is Bipolar as well as having various physical ailments. Several years ago I had the bright idea (I.E. stupid idea) to cast a spell helping to carry his burden of pain when it became too much for him. So I set my alter up, had my various healing herbs and candles and cast my spell. What followed was nothing. Or so I thought it was just another dud spell that didn't work the way I intended it to. Hey it happens to us all.

I worded my spell so that when my DH felt too overwhelmed and unable to go on that I'd "carry the burden". Meaning I'd feel his pain. I knew it probably wasn't the greatest idea I had, but just getting rid of his pain wasn't working. DH was convinced that the pain isn't suppose to go away and he's somehow meant to suffer. So I was desperate to help.

Over the weeks nothing happened and all was relatively normal. Then I noticed I began to get a little depressed. It was only for an hour or two and also coincided with DH first saying his head was too much, and then his moods leveling out and he'd mention he felt almost normal. During this time I'd become depressed, mad, and downright crazy. I didn't connect the two (Honestly I forgot about the spell by this time) till DH and I had our one and only fight that almost broke us up. Then I finally connected the dots I could see how subtle the spell was and how well it actually worked.

After explaining to my husband about the spell and why my head went a bit freaky, he insisted I reverse the spell and never do healing work for him again. I broke my cardinal rule. Never attempt a healing without permission, and never keep anyone's pain.   

But if I had it all to do over again, I'd repeat my mistakes. Yes it almost cost me my marriage and made me seriously insane for awhile. But it also taught me a lot about energy healing and about what my husband feels every single day. I have more patience and empathy for him now that I know what it means when he says he's angry for no reason. That was a foreign concept to me before the spell.

So my lesson for today. Don't be afraid to make mistakes as long as you learn something from them. And its probably not a good idea to forget you cast for something, even if you think it didn't work. A week, or a month, or even a year later you might be pleasantly (or not so pleasantly) surprised.

PBP: Mercury Retrograde

Prompt: Another Mercury Retrograde

Mercury appears to be moving backwards in the sky.... and for some people that means nothing. For others, however, who pay attention to the stars and the planets, Mercury moving backwards can mean a lot of things....

So, first off, do you pay attention to these Retrogrades?

If so, do you prepare for them?

Does knowing that it is happening make it easier to deal with the challenges that appear?

If you didn't know it was happening, would it still affect your life?

Any thoughts on this current Retrograde?

~Magickal Graphics~

 

 

To be honest I don't pay attention to what phase were in as much as I probably should.  I take note if there's a retrograde and I usually comment to my husband to expect more mood swings because I do think he is effected by the moons phase and the planets positions. I wish there was more studies on the planets, stars and moon in relation to human emotion and mental health. Unfortunately there is not. So I'll just have to maintain my opinion that my husband goes a little more wacko during times of full moons and retrogrades.

Is Psychic Ability & Mental Illness linked?

One of the comments on my Hereditary Witches post prompted me to ask this question. Do you believe psychic ability and mental illness has a link? Can one be caused by the other? I am really not sure, so I look at my own family to help me answer my question.

My mother is the first person in my family I've known to have a mental illness. Before I was born she was very suicidal. She has a 3 inch thick (Not even joking here) folder full of her hospital visits and what the doctors diagnosed for her. There are too many diagnosis to remember, but the one I do remember is schizophrenia.
Despite the doctors diagnosis, I doubt my mother is schizophrenic. I've never known her to hallucinate or have delusions. She does go through periods of depression, so I've no doubt some kind of mental disorder is at play here. Regardless of what she has, I know my mother isn't a medium. She has an abnormally high level of focus, and I believe she's lucid dreamed before, but that's about it as far as ESP.

My husband is the second person in my life with a mental illness (Bipolar disorder). And I do know he is a very good psychic. When he was healthy he had such an extremely rare gift for reading people. In his case however, when his mental illness got worse his ability to read people declined as did his spiritual connection. That is because he no longer has the focus required to listen to the spirits. He's often told me he still hears murmurs, but its like someone talking with their hand covering their mouth. They are there, you just can't understand.

So I have two examples. One I know is a psychic but loses his gift, the other no gift but a long list of mental disease. So that leads me to believe that it depends on the individual. I do think mental illness can be linked with psychic ability. That's not to say that psychic ability is a sham and only caused by delusions. Perhaps because the person has something different in their brain its easier to accept a connection with the spirit world. For others maybe it makes it harder.

What do you think? Are there any examples you can think of that show a connection?

Living with a Bipolar Spouse: How to support your loved one

Our Family. 2008

Having a mental disorder is tough, but being the spouse of a bipolar patient can be equally so. Learn how to be your loved ones support without loosing yourself in the process.

 So you’re happily married with children and then your spouse becomes moody. Perhaps one minute they are angry, then sad, and finally super happy. This is a sign of mental illness. I’ve been there.
    My name is Robin, and my husband Lance is a Bipolar (type 2) patient. When we married in November of 1998 we had no idea that in a few short years my husband would be in more physical and mental pain than we could imagine. Each bipolar patient is different, so the advice I give here is only an example of how you can support your loved one through their mental illness. I hope that by writing this article, I can at least guide one person through the life of supporting a bipolar patient.
    Lance also suffers from chronic pain. Through his teens and early twenties he suffered injuries. Arthritis in his spine, bursitis in his shoulders, and a crushed knee from football has caused his entire body pain; he’s also only 40 years old. With the birth of our daughter, everything changed. He became moody and withdrawn. When I asked what was wrong, though he tried to assure me all was fine, I could tell it was not. The moment came when my husband pushed our daughter away from him when she tried to hug her daddy. That is when he admitted something was not right.
    Like most men, Lance had no desire to see a doctor. After that day with our daughter though, I convinced him to see our general practitioner. This is important because so many women are dealing with spouses who go undiagnosed. Convince your spouses to see a medical professional if you suspect a mental illness. Lance was diagnosed with depression and a multitude of other things over a two year period. Medication for depression was given and at first it seemed to help. Our general practitioner was convinced that he could treat Lance’s mental illness, so he was not referred to a psychologist or psychiatrist. For two years Lance would take the medication, after a few weeks, his mood would crash and Lance would be to the point of almost suicide. Though he never went into the hospital, there were more times than I know my husband is willing to talk about that he was on the verge of suicide.
    At one point, Lance had to remove all of his weapons from our home. He would not tell me why he decided to do this until years later, but that day he sat in a room with a gun in his mouth. He said the only thought that made him stop is the thought that I’d walk in and see his bloody corpse. I thank the gods that he had the strength to live.
    After two years and several more drugs, doctors’ appointments, and wasted time, Lance was diagnosed by a nurse practitioner as being Bipolar. He finally received his referral to a psychologist. It makes me angry to think he wasted two years with a general doctor because of one doctor’s ego. This is my second lesson for those who are supporting a bipolar patient. Make sure they have a good doctor. If I had insisted Lance get a second opinion from a different clinic then perhaps that episode with the gun would never have happened.
    After diagnosis, it’s important to learn all about Bipolar disorder. In many ways you will be your spouse’s rock. It’s important to learn how to recognize which phase (depression or manic) they are in and be able to be there for them. I have little experience with type one Bipolar disorder. My experience is with rapid cycling or Bipolar disorder type two. Additionally, it’s important to research any medication your spouse’s doctor prescribes. Two side effects I’ve found to be worrisome is dizziness and forgetfulness. They don’t sound like side effects to worry about, but it’s another thing entirely when your husband is driving a country road, forgets what he’s doing and almost wreaks your brand new SUV. Yes, it happened to us - the almost wreak, not a collision. There were various times when Lance over-dosed himself as well. Now taking one extra pill is probably not going to send anyone to the emergency room, but it will mess with the mood cycles. Too much or too little medication will start a rapid cycle.
    I’ve found that little things are the best way to cope with depression or manic episodes. For depression, I really believe laughter is the best medicine. Since most patients are lethargic or just what to hide in their homes, I find that snuggling up with a good comedy helps here. It may not bring your spouse out of their mood swing, but it does help to reassure them that you are there and you love them. If you must be away from them for a day, send an email or call once. I find that especially for depression, saying I love you is the best medicine I can provide because at this time, thoughts are going through their head that their unloved, a burden to the family, and worthless. Our love helps to reassure them that these thoughts are only because of a chemical imbalance in the brain and not their true feelings.
    Manic swings in my opinion are the worst. I am a down to earth kind of girl myself. So when my husband goes into a manic episode I inwardly groan. Bubbly, giggly, over the top enthusiasm is exhausting. But this is a perfect time to get out of the house and have some fun. Try to rein in your spouses impulses. No driving wild and wreak less, no speeding down the interstate. Often in manic episodes, patients can become care free. Remind them that what they are feeling isn’t normal, and they must try to control their impulses. Take a nature hike or do something energetic and fun. Its more bonding for you and it helps him to control his mood. 
    Lastly, don’t forget about you. At times it can seem that you live to help your spouse get through the day. I swear its not that much work most of the time - especially if the medication is doing its job. Don’t forget to take a soak in the tub and indulge yourself with some alone time.

So to recap:
If you suspect your spouse has a mental illness, convince him/her to seek a mental health professional. Remember not all doctors are created equal.
Learn all you can about your spouses condition. Become familiar with the different types and phases of Bipolar disorder.
Research any medication prescribed. Know what side effects to look for and avoid. Keep track of your spouse’s daily dose.
Learn to recognize what phase your spouse is currently in. Then find what works best for your spouse to cope.
Don’t forget yourself. It’s important to keep yourself healthy.